Friendship isn't always easy. Most of the time it is dinners and movies and BBQs in the summer. In my world there seems to be a lot of dancing and drinking which is great, but from time to time friendship requires that you put down your beer for a second and WORK AT IT. Ok...so maybe it requires that you pick up another beer and work at it, maybe even order a round of shots, but either way there are moments where it gets hard to be friends.
When we were kids we just picked up our Barbies - or for you guys, our GI Joes - and went home, but now that we are adults it isn't quite that easy. Have you ever tried to re-pack the case of beer after you already stuffed it into the party fridge? It never seems to fit back in the case right and when you pick it up and the bottom falls out and the beer lands on your foot...ahem...sorry...I digress...
Anyway - I have just have a few questions about friendship and I figured who better to give honest feedback then my myspace friends. I am actually looking for real feedback from others that will help me determine if I am a good friend or a bad friend. I won't tell you my answers to these questions - I will simply pose them and based on responses I will do a little self inspection to determine how I rate.
I am a little nervous. I hope I rate myself highly. I think I have test anxiety coming on...
Here we go :
1. Do you believe you should question your close friends actions if you strongly believe they are completely deluded?
2. Do you still question that person's actions if they are convinced they are doing the right thing and genuinely seem happy?
3. Do you tell your close friend if you think their significant other is a complete douchebag?
4. Do you tell your close friend if everyone who meets their significant other thinks (s)he is a complete douchebag?
5. Do you tell your friend that everyone thinks their significant other is a complete douchebag if you know for a fact that everyone is lying to your close friend about whether or not they think the significant other is a douchebag?
OK - moving on:
6. If you have a close friend who suddenly drops you like a hot rock because they have found the (wo)man of their dreams do you welcome them back with open arms just because they suddenly find time to talk to you?
7. Do you forgive that same close friend if they admittedly ditched you in your time of need "just to spite you?"
8. Do you call your close friend to the mat when they state that you hate them because they changed when you don't hate them at all and even if you did hate them it certainly wouldn't be because they changed, but instead it would be because they had absolutely no regard for your friendship the second they met their significant other?
Hmmmm - I don't think any of that makes a lot of sense anywhere but inside my head, but those are the questions I felt compelled to ask tonight.
I always felt like even though I am flawed (like most people) I put effort into my friendships and work at them when they need to be worked at. I have had some friendships that ended on a positive note and others that just ended, but very few that ended ugly and STAYED ugly. Even the most volatile of my relationships settled into a kind of mutual fondness after some time passed.
Most people who know me (I hope) would say that they can count on me to be there when the chips are down. I have been known to completely REARRANGE my entire weekend and my family's weekend just to be there to take care of (drink with) a friend in need and I ALWAYS bring the Kleenex (chocolate cake shots).
I just hate passive aggressiveness and I get so angry at people who condemn you because you believe in telling it how it is. I don't lie to my friends and my friends all know that. I call them on their crap and they call me on mine. Don't get me wrong - if you are having a shitty day because your cat died I am not going to point out that it was a crappy cat that had a smelly butt and peed on the rug. It isn't about being mean or trying to hold people down. It is about knowing that there are people in the world that love you enough to be honest even when it isn't easy. THAT is friendship. If that makes me a bitch then you can call me BITCH! I'll consider it an honor.
Oh...and the next time my pants make me look fat you better freakin' tell me!
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